The things that I find in my yard...

I honestly would never have guessed we have these things in Michigan. But one day, there it was. Hanging from a branch next to my driveway. Scaring the crap out of me. I had to mow around it for months.

I should have photographed it before I cut it down, but the truth is, I was so excited when I was at the end of the driveway and I realized that the nasty vicious hornets (or whatever they were) were gone that I scurried straight over to the garage for the nippers and cut the damned thing down. The entryway wound up collapsing -- it hit the ground and crushed, revealing some fantastic details in the layering and... stuff inside. It'll get dissected before too long, but for now it's just so darned pretty, the whole thing is sitting on the bench on my porch.

And here's your scale to fully appreciate the ginormity.

Update: After a little bit of research, I'm quite convinced that this was the hive of the baldfaced hornet. Now I'm not normally bothered by bugs, flying or otherwise, but I instinctively stayed far away from these buggers. After reading that page, I'm glad I did. "Run like hell" indeed.

Detroit at 52 mph

I finally got a new phone.

The ear speaker (as opposed to the speakerphone) had broken on my dear old Sidekick II a while ago (like, months), and I never seemed to know where my earpiece was, so I stopped using it as a phone. Then the email server stopped cooperating with Hotmail. Then I was sporadically not getting text messages.

I continued to stubbornly hold off replacing the handset until T-Mobile released the new Sidekick LX, which was slated for the end of October. That would answer all my problems! Right? Well. The day the hardware was released, I called T-Mobile -- with whom I had been out of contract for something like two years -- and told them I'd been waiting for three months to get this new phone, remaining loyal to T-Mo the whole time, no matter what everyone said about them and their smelly service.

"I have a corporate discount. I'm willing to sign a 2 year contract. I've been a customer of yours for three years. What's the best price you can give me on the new Sidekick?"

"$299.99."

"That's insane. I can actually get an iPhone for $300.* And ATT's service plan costs about the same as yours." (*I have a friend.)

"Well, I can understand why you'd want to get an iPhone then."

So not only did I finally get a new phone, I got a Jesusphone. I resisted. I really did. It's all T-Mobile's fault.

It takes pretty good pictures, though.

Another happy swap!

Over at craftster, a painting caught my eye. (Yes, people post actual art there, too.) I emailed the artist to ask her if it was for sale. I was disappointed to find that the painting was already spoken for, but thrilled to hear that she generally just paints for friends or trades. I sent her to my Flickr stream to take a look at some stuff I've made to see if maybe we could work something out. She liked my Bride of Frankenstein bag, so we agreed I'd make her a sorta steroided-up version.

It's difficult to photograph, but here are the pictures. The printed fabric is encased in vinyl for durability and the piece features some interior and exterior embroidery and a stolen (shhhh) wrist strap. I also made a wallet, with nothing stolen.

In exchange, Brenna made me this fantastic Frankensquid. Obviously she and I are fans of the same colors as her bag and my painting look like they came from the same palette. This is the picture she sent me before I received the painting. It went up on my wall about 15 minutes after I unpacked it, but I haven't taken a picture yet. Really I need to hang it a bit higher -- my art usually goes low-ish, but this one really wants to be higher.

Couldn't be happier with this swap. Makes me want to do more ASAP!

Saturday at Home

A typical Saturday:

Wake up around 10am, but refuse to get out of bed until around 11.

Roll out, drink a glass of water, check email, eat something really shitty for lunch. Think, hmmmm, what am I going to do today? Nothing? Yeah, nothing sounds about right. Until later. Wanna go out later. Go see some music. What am I going to wear... Ugh, this again. Hm, maybe I should make something. Haha, yeah right, make something when you've got no projects started, no ideas, and you want to wear it tonight. Lunatic.

Become unable to give up the idea of making something, obsess slightly, and start thumbing through the pattern database. Find something that flips a switch and makes me remember the big pile of supercool Japanese slinky (technical term) that's been in my stash for years. Make this deal with myself: You can only make this project if it involves zero purchases and you can finish it today without rushing and cutting corners.

Put on some random basic cable marathon, make a big pitcher of iced tea, and start laying out pattern pieces.

Four and a half hours later, stretch out all the back and shoulder aches, and be a little amazed that the dress turned out so well. Shower, dress, fail at taking a self-portrait in new dress, head downtown.

Shrink Plastic

Yes, shrink plastic, aka Shrinky Dinks. This is not trademark Dink, if I recall, but it's all the same stuff.

I had an idea for a larger swallow pendant in bright red. So I got it all colored and cut out and chucked in the oven. As I watched the magic happen, some extra magic got thrown in -- the bird was not shrinking and flattening as predicted. The horror! As I watched the thin pointy tail curl up and start to stick, I thought ruined! Then I rethought, no wait, it actually looks pretty cool. Yoinked it out and let it cool. Turns out I was right, it IS cool.

I strung it up on some relatively fine silver chain, gave it a star (which is closer in color than it looks in the photo) and called it done. I actually like it quite a lot.

For the record, when shrink plastic curls or does not flatten, it's actually not ruined at all. It can be reheated and pulled apart with a toothpick, and if it is not flat (and you want it to be), you should press it under an oven mitt immediately upon removing it from the oven. No big deal, in reality.

Critter Wednesday

If turtle has shown up, you may need to ask yourself some questions. Are you not seeing what you should? Are you not hearing what you should? Are you or those around you not using discrimination?

Walking down the path from my home to my car on my way to work this morning, amid the leaves and sticks and recently-dropped berries, a tiny prehistoric shape caught my eye. It wasn't moving, just sitting there on the pavement. It's funny how vividly living things can jump out from general detritus.

I knelt down to take a look and found a perfectly miniaturized version of the giant turtle who had visited me two summers ago.

The details on a turtle are amazing. Although this one is clearly brand new, they always look a million years old. I was worried, at first, because the creek behind my house is a couple hundred feet away -- what was this tiny fella doing all the way on the other side of the house? But, recognizing that he and his fellows had survived millennia without me to carry them down to the creek, I resisted that impulse that all children have when they find a baby bird, and left him to his own. Well, almost. I had to get a good picture of him first.

He had hopped up into the grass and was rather quickly making his way north (the creek is east). I pulled him out just for a second, and was surprised to find his shell slightly soft (not to mention quite dirt-caked). The tiny feet and claws swam through the air, but never withdrew into the shell. His beak already looked sharp and powerful, but he never opened it. I took a couple of quick close-ups -- couldn't resist the tail, medieval-weapon that it is -- and put him back where I found him, where he quickly made good his escape.

Most people would probably like to think of a tiger or a stallion or even a kitten as their totem, but I swear if I had a Patronus, it would probably wind up being a giant snapper.

Open Call: "Cyrano" at Haberman Fabrics

I don't know how many people get to this blog from links at other locations, but this call goes out to anyone in the Detroit area who is interested in sewing or theatre.

Next month, Haberman Fabrics (Royal Oak) is having an interesting-looking event showcasing and discussing the costuming for the Michigan Opera Theater's upcoming premiere presentation of the opera "Cyrano." I don't know much about theatre costuming, by which I mean I know nothing. So, of course, this event is pretty irresistible. (That they are giving away tickets and backstage passes to the performance is a good bonus, because I think this is one I'd like to see.)

So! Anyone want to join me?

Tuesday, September 11, 2007, at 7pm, at Haberman Fabrics in Royal Oak. Advance tickets are $10, or $15 at the door.

Details at http://www.habermanfabrics.com/special_events/cyrano/nose_for_design.htm

Surprise Package

When I came home tonight, there was an unexpected package awaiting me on my doorstep. And for once, it was not:
1. Misdelivered
2. Notice of audit/lawsuit/etc.
3. My stuff being returned from a friend who is going underground.

This time, to my delight, the box contained a new Panasonic DV camcorder with a note of congratulations from the Mountain Dew summer sweepstakes, which I enter maybe 2 or 3 times a week (whenever I drink a diet Mt Dew).

Who's the porn queen now?

Doe and Fawn

I know this view looks familiar, but this is actually a new experience at the house.

Last night I was sitting in the living room watching TV, when once again, some motion in the front yard caught my attention. Initially I just saw the big doe standing there, rather still, not doing much of anything. Since this has become fairly commonplace, I went back to watching TV.

A couple of seconds later, though, I saw the speckled little fawn stroll across my windows. This is why we get this "quick, get the camera!" view looking through my living room and out the front windows. (Yes, that couch really is that orange, by the way.) If you look at the full view of the pic, you can see the little fawn munching on the tree right next to the walkway to my front door, while mama stands in the background, keeping an eye out.

They spent a bit of time around my place, pulling on various leafery. The fawn was almost unbearably cute, but difficult to photograph because he kept moving, and because it was after 8pm, so getting the light was difficult. He would pull some leaves off and then flap his big ears, scratching with a rear hoof, then trot around looking for more of... whatever it was he was looking for.

Eventually, they moved around to the back of the house (with me stalking them from the inside), preparing to move back down the ravine. That was when I noticed the doe's side. I don't know much about deer, but it looks to me like this could be molting. I was much more alarmed when I first saw what looked like scars on her side. I do, after all, have a pack of coyotes living back there, too.

Optical Greeen

Sometimes I take pictures of things after I've worn them. Like I'm either so anxious to wear the thing that I can't spare the 90 seconds to photograph it... or, more likely, I don't trust that it's not going to self-destruct the first time it leaves the house, so I don't want any evidence before it's proven it's mettle. Thence, the wrinkles in the front. This shirt served proudly at a friend's concert Saturday night. And it didn't explode once.

If you view the picture at its full size, you'll see that those are not exactly optical illusions in the print. It's actually a really great stripey, pointy, overlappy three-color (or so) design. I knew it was going to be a shirt, because I like shirts that make people go crosseyed.

This particular sewing pattern -- Butterick 4985 -- has an interesting construction, with the lower bodice being separate. I also like the puffy sleeves. Muttony! My big challenges were doing even gathers (and there are loads of them -- top sleeve, bottom sleeve, under bust...) and installing those button holes. Those are both things I'm not very experienced with. Turns out, not so threatening. I built the matching fabric-covered buttons, too, which I really like.

I admit I'm kind of a spaz for zippers, so I'm definitely thinking about how I'd do another version in a heavier fabric with a zipper in the front. Hmmmmm.

But first, I have to iron this one.

Detroit Urban Craft Fair

Everyone who is in the Detroit area should put this on their calendars for Saturday the 4th. (And if you're going to go, let me know and we can say hello. I'll be the one on the big fat scooter.)

This is their second year, and I'm sure it's going to be a good time. They've been building up to it for months.

And yes, this is a paid announcement. They promised to give me some stuff for posting -- and I'm all for free Detroit crafty gear!

Details at www.detroiturbancraftfair.com

What time is it? Godzilla time!

I'm not hungover today, but I am BORED AS HELL. So I made a Godzilla clock. This was almost impossible to photograph, so click on it to see it more in full.

WTF and Cheez-It Bag

Two blog posts today because, frankly, I'm hungover and not in a hurry to do anything that involves me leaving the island of paradise that is my sofa. (Mmm, I can smell people cooking out nearby...)

This project was for a friend at work who is a copy editor. I wanted to make a pendant that looked like an old typewriter key, but for a character which would be more appropriately impossible. "WTF" it is! The pendant itself is made from a metal clothing button, with two-part resin over paper. (The resin I used was really not made for this sort of project, so it was a big PITA getting it to set properly. At least I hope it's set properly... I made her promise to tell me if anything about it fell apart. [Which is my standard caveat when I give people stuff I made, by the way.])

I am either really bad at wrapping presents or I'm really lazy at wrapping presents, so I always prefer to make a little presentation bag of some sort. Add to this the fact that I love packaging and I really love Cheez-Its, and we have the vinyl-covered half-zip Cheez-It gift bag. (To answer the question that's been burning in the bosom of humanity for millennia, yes, one can put an empty Cheez-It bag through a dishwashing cycle.) Woo! Woo? I guess -- she seemed to like it.

Red Shirt Recon

Red Shirt Recon Before

I love men's "camp" shirts -- camp as in canoing and toasted marshmallows, I guess, rather than camp as in John Waters -- and have a closet full of them. I love how colorful they are, and they always seem to be made of these great flowy rayons. However, when I wear them I tend to look as though I am a giant rectangle. Not my preferred shape.

One of my vague goals in learning how to sew is to be able to refit some of these awesome shirts (which I usually get resale for $2-$6). Last weekend, I finally just took matters into hand and hacked at one.

I picked this shirt because I love the colors and because of that great soft fabric. If you look closely, that print is not abstract... there are little skulls in there! But, typically, it was shapeless on me -- fit me okay in the chest, but the "short" sleeves came over my elbows and the hem made most of the trip down to my knees. I wasn't crazy about that tiki border down at the bottom either.

Red Shirt Recon Detail

Red Shirt Recon After

After some experimenting, the entirety of the modifications came down to this: Curve and take in side seams, remove sleeves and recut (using a flutter sleeve from a commercial pattern as reference), add side bust darts, shorten and reshape lower hem, remove collar but leave collar band.

A relative success, but not entirely. I wound up taking a little more in at the side when I reattached the sleeves (for them to fit) which made it just a teench to small for me to fully button across my chest. Ah well, I usually wear undershirts with button-downs anyway. It was definitely good enough that I wore it for a nice long motorcycle ride with a friend that same weekend, and I'm sure I'll be using the same tactics on some other obnoxious shirt before too long.

Kitty vs. Deer

I wish I WISH I could have gotten this in better focus, but it was getting very near dusk when this was taken. I was sitting in my living room when I actually heard the deer in my front yard, pulling leaves. I watched her through the front window for a few minutes, then went out the side door onto the deck. (You can just see the railing in the lower right corner -- hopefully that will give some scale. Zoom in on the picture, it's totally worth it.) The deer was, as usual, quite unbothered by my presence. The cat wasn't even particularly alarmed... and I don't even KNOW that cat. For a brilliant few seconds, they both watched ME as if I were some exotic creature on their turf.

After a little while, the cat crossed across to the right and rolled around in the dirt about 8 feet from the deer. When the deer's grazing took her in the cat's direction, the cat beat a hasty retreat.

I stood out on the deck watching her until it was dark.

The Expo Dress

This dress was kind of a long time coming. Or maybe it just seems that way.

I don't usually discuss projects with people ahead of time, or ask for input. I'm pretty impulse-driven. But when I realized in mid-May that I had actually given myself enough time to make an outfit for the Northern Ink Xposure tattoo convention in mid-June, I asked around for some suggestions. I vaguely believed I wanted to make a dress. I don't know jack about dresses.

I stopped in at two of my usual places, Pattern Review and Craftster to get some input. It didn't take long for me to decide what it was going to be. As of this weekend, I finally finished it.

I didn't put all that much time into actually making the dress. The thing is, I TALKED about it so much that it seemed to follow me everywhere! The dress and the jacket are actually two different Simplicity patterns, which I believe compliment each other well. The fabrics are an Alexander Henry print called "Born to Ride" (yes, really) and a black Italian damask.

The damask is just beautiful, with a woven black-on-black design. Happily, I will be wearing this outfit in the daylight for at least some of the time at the convention, and that's really when the damask looks its best. Oh, and as I have to tell everyone who has seen these pictures so far (I told you I've been talking about it a lot!), the dress fits me better than it fits Heddy.

Skeel

Oh to hell with the formatting. Here are some squirrels! (And a rabbit.)

Argh, Blogger...

Blogger "updated" my template, in the process losing my custom formatting. Who cares? I cares. Now I have to fix the thing rather than posting pictures of squirrels.

The Geek/Crafter Connection

Commercial Patterns Stats:

Patterns owned: 140
Patterns sewn: 26
Patterns on wish list: 119

How I know this: I designed/developed a custom Filemaker Pro database to track my sewing patterns. It includes tech data, photos (from maker sites or my own pics), changeable focus image and a near-infinite notes area. Everything is searchable and indexable.

Yeah. You're jealous. I know.

And yeah. I'm a dork. I know.

Today's critter: A story about lint.

I'm a little weird about picking up every little piece of lint and detritus on my carpet. This is a good example of why. I wouldn't have wanted to step on this... but he was fun to play with! It was late night when I found him, so it was difficult to photograph him and do any justice to the variegations in green he displayed. Very pretty. He eventually joined the small tree in the front of my house.

Critter-o-Thursday

This is the corner of my slab porch and the little brick enclosure that's to my right as I'm leaving my house. That enclosure is under my front windows, and I've planted some wildflowers there which haven't taken yet. That's why the ground looks so blasted there -- I had to rake up a bunch of stuff and, you know, push dirt.

Which does nothing to explain what greeted me as I was skipping merrily out my door today. After I literally came to a skidding stop and stared at it for a second, it just stayed there and... flicked. I figured it would be gone by the time I unlocked my door, went inside, grabbed my camera and came back out, but... clearly not. It's cute! And I've been seeing a lot of them lately.

Live Life Without Irons

I'm getting pretty accustomed to sewing with commercial patterns, but I haven't advanced far enough to create my own. Not entirely.

But with the help of this tutorial, I made myself a 6-gore circle skirt (sans pockets), entirely self-drafted. It's three parts Jeep fabric, three parts embroidered camo. I had to punt a little with the waistband (zip and button in rear), but it WORKED, which is always a thrill. It's just above-knee and fits me better than it does Heddy Headless, my dressmaker's dummy, which is why the waistband looks a little gappy.

I like bias tape as a finish because it's a lot easier than hemming a circle and also unifies the various panels.

Here's a detail of the fabrics, because they are so cool (both purchased at Joann on the cheap, as usual). One of the slogans on the Jeep fabric is "Live Life Without Limits."

These pictures were taken after the skirt had been worn on a night out, so it's a little wrinkledy. Stood up well, though, which is frankly always something I'm a leetle worried about when I wear my own clothing out.

Pinky Proof

But proof of what?

A: A sewing machine can be hazardous even when not switched on.
B: I am a danger to myself.
C: My new habit of photographing everything... maybe not such a great thing.

Today's critter sighting.

I trotted into the house tonight around 19.30, merrily chatting away with a friend on the phone, and made my way straight to the doorwall to open up the house. (Beautiful day today!) When I saw her out there, I oh-so-rudely interrupted my friend to tell him hush hush, let me tell you what I'm looking at here.

I don't know much about deer, but she looks like a youngish one. My camera was on the table behind me, so I grabbed it and sat on the floor to try to take a couple snaps without moving around too much, all the while describing her over the phone. She really didn't seem very bothered by me; slowly stepping back and forth in the little area next to my deck, sniffing the air, ears occasionally twitching, she even looked directly at me a couple of times. I'm not sure where her friends were, but you know deer -- where there's one, there's a dozen.

What was especially funny -- and unfortunately unphotographable -- was when I noticed a little more movement over to the left of my vision. Oh lookie there, it's our little raccoon friend! I didn't ask him for ID, but the coloring (light patch on his left hip) convinced me that it's the same one I videod. (Videoed?) He was travelling in the general direction of the deer, who had her back to him at the moment, when he noticed her and froze. Then he turned around and ran in the other direction! Who knew the white-tail was the natural enemy of the raccoon?

After several minutes of generally aimless gracefulness, the deer casually made her retreat down a path to the ravine. So damned pretty.

Welcome!

One more thing about this place of mine. It's true that I have a coat rack on my porch, but this is how you really know you're at my joint. This is the beautiful redhead that greets you outside my door. (Yes, she's mounted on my front door. You can just see the frame in the photo in the previous post.)

"It's just grass."

I've been in my house for about 2.5 years now. You may have noticed that I like taking pictures of it. I don't know how long I'll be here, but I do enjoy documenting the place. Today's photo is a slightly different view from my usual top-of-driveway. Semi-ironically, what you can't see is a big part of my inspiration for spending all day today mowing and trimming and bricking and hosing -- my porch overhang has finally been reaffixed with a light that isn't a fingernail away from falling out of the hole and knocking out the pizza dude. And my roof and gutters are clean. Thanks, Buddha! (I'm not allowed to use ladders by myself.)

When I was originally looking at buying this place, it was late Fall, and before letting ourselves in, my Realtor and I paused to watch a crew of about 6 men working on the 1++ acre yard. Bruce looked down at me in that patriarchal way that's almost avoidable from a man a foot taller than myself. "That's... an awful lot of yard," he said, the little lady understood but unspoken.

I smiled in goofy desperation, because from the time I'd seen the place I knew I'd be living here. "It's just grass." flutter flutter

Well, let me tell you. "It's just grass" becomes a lot more fun when you've got the right pardner. And this is my pardner. I won't go all Tim Taylor here, but I will say that the motor on this little golden devil is almost as big as what's in my motorcycle (and quite a bit bigger than my first bike).

Seriously.

Handsome, really.

I know they're pests. I know he would kill me if given half the chance. But still... cayooooot! I'm enthralled by ANY critters in my yard, of course (maybe you've noticed), but in my couple of years at my wildness abode, I've never seen a raccoon here. Seriously. Coyotes? Check. Spiders the size of my hand? Double-check. But this is my first bandito. So I got a little footage through my kitchen windows.



(My original footage is a little better, but I had to let YouTube chew it up for posting purposes.)

Amber Suite

A couple of months ago I went to a gem and jewelry show at a local civic center. I hadn't bought beads in a long time because I still have bags and bags of unutilized beauty awaiting attention, so I went mostly for entertainment, with the idea that something would have to be particularly notable to come home with me.

And then I saw these hanks of semi-raw amber. They were so chunky and unpolished and interesting! I grabbed a strand thinking, all right, this is mine IF I can find something that is going to go with it TODAY. No hoarding -- either we come away from this show with a project ready to go, or we come away empty-handed. After visiting every booth in the joint, I had my collection: lavastone, moonstone and a large carved bone Chinese bat (a favorite symbol of mine) to serve as a focus. A feast of natural textures!

I think it was the next afternoon that I put it all together in a jewelry suite -- necklace, bracelet (on elastic) and ring (wire-wrapped). The bat disc is about 3" across and is attached by waxed cord, looped through Chinese stopper knots, which match the little black lavastones nicely.

Each of the pieces is actually kind of big, so some planning goes into wearing them. Pretty, though. Click on any of 'em to see bigger versions with more of the pretty.

My bedroom is about an hour darker now.

I didn't think I needed a new shade for my bedroom. Then I saw a heat-fusible roller shade kit in the clearance aisle at Joann. Red stickers work like magic. This particular one promised me that if I found a fabric I liked in that very store on that very day, it would join forces with me to make the gee-golly-keenest bedroom shade ever! And thus the hunt began.

I did find that perfect* fabric, and grabbed a bundle. Then home to the big cutting table.

Neat, huh? More subtle from a distance, but practically hollers my name in the up-close.

In addition to the fabric being 5839038 miles long, it's a geometric pattern, which meant that I had to get it perfectly straight to the edges of the shade. Because... I had to. I didn't take any pictures of the assembly process, but using this shade kit is quite simple. However. Have you ever folded king-size sheets by yourself? Working with a big, uncut length of fabric is a bit like doing that. With both hands asleep. Which is why there are no photos -- arms not long enough.

Once the length of fabric is in place, all you have to do is iron, iron, iron your way to a funktastic new shade! It's not very light-blocking, but the finished product is pretty cool as a detail. Worth the hassle. Oh and definitely worth the $5 it cost me for the kit.

P.S. My bedroom is never ever actually this bright. I had to take a flash-photo to show what was going on.

*There is no such thing as perfection in anything. Ever.